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George Mitchell visiting each complex and launching unproven steroid allegations into the stands with a pressurized air cannon.

March 11: March Madness begins in the traditional fashion as office copiers across the nation run out of toner due to Florida coach Billy Donovan printing out his résumé.

March 25: After months of hype, NASCAR unveils its "Car of Tomorrow" but the race turns into a major disappointment when drivers roll into the pits and learn that the vehicle's water fuel cell hasn't been invented yet.

April 2: With the Gators leading Ohio State 40-29 at halftime, coach Billy Donovan gets confused and leaves Florida to fill the new coaching vacancy at Florida. Donovan changes his mind during "One Shining Moment" and leaves Florida to return to Florida but not before Eddie Sutton comes out of retirement to count the Gators' victory as his 799th career win.

Sports bloggers think this means the end of his career and also that the whole belated and belabored affair stinks of a witch hunt.

Deadspin argues there's no real evidence against Bonds: "The key point to remember in the Barry Bonds indictment that went down yesterday afternoon is that we really don't have any new information. Whatever your thoughts on Bonds, it's clear that the government is out to get him. You might think he deserves it. He probably does. But there is no smoking gun; the feds have been trying for four years to come up with the definitive piece of damning information on Bonds."

Brit Lawrence Donegan at the Guardian's sportblog seconds that notion: "[W]e are not at that point yet and won't be until (or, more accurately, unless) Barry Bonds is convicted of lying when he told the grand jury he hadn't knowingly used performance-enhancing drugs.

WHILE SHARES OF NORTHWEST AIRLINES have lost altitude since the company emerged from bankruptcy last May, analysts are increasingly optimistic about the airline's outlook and an alternative investment specialist has increased its stake in the airline.

Wayzata Investment Partners recently acquired an additional 2.4 million shares of the Minneapolis-based airline, according to a Thursday filing with the Securities and Exchange Commission. Wayzata now holds 13.1 million shares of Northwest, up from 10.8 million as of June 30. ...

Lots of the big tech companies on show at the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas have already unveiled details of some of their forthcoming gadgets in anticipation of the start of the CES.